rocks Archive

Star Trek: The Next Generation Re-Watch: “Captain’s Holiday”

– June 27, 2013 8:00 amPosted in: TNG Re-Watch

captainsholiday101 “Captain’s Holiday”
Written by Ira Steven Behr
Directed by Chip Chalmers

Season 3, Episode 19
Original air date: April 2, 1990
Star date: 43745.2

Mission summary

Two overdressed aliens transport to the paradise planet Risa… If this sounds like the opening to a joke, you aren’t far off. Unlike most of the people on holiday there, these aliens aren’t looking for a relaxing getaway on a suns-lit beach; they’re only after one thing: Captain Jean-Luc Picard, who wouldn’t be caught dead at a resort like that. When they’re informed that he isn’t there and has no vacation plans on the schedule, they confidently state: “He will come.” Spoilers!

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Tags: action hero, archaeology, ferengi, handwaving mumblemumble, picard gets in a punch, picard is a chuck norris joke, picard's love life, risa, rocks, sexism, sexual harassment, shore leave, time travel, transporters solve everything, wibbly wobbly timey-wimey

Star Trek: The Next Generation Re-Watch: “The Enemy”

Eugene Myers

– February 14, 2013 8:00 amPosted in: TNG Re-Watch

theenemy185 “The Enemy”
Written by David Kemper and Michael Piller
Directed by David Carson

Season 3, Episode 7
Original air date: November 6, 1989
Star date: 43349.2

Mission summary

A distress signal leads Enterprise to a crappier-than-usual planet, Galorndon Core, where a small away team discovers the remnants of a Romulan shuttle–which was apparently destroyed after it crash-landed. Worf stumbles across an injured Romulan and promptly injures him some more to make him easier to rescue. Meanwhile, the hapless La Forge becomes the proverbial “boy in the well” when the ground crumbles beneath him and he plummets into a crevasse. Because of magnetic interference in the atmosphere that disrupts transporter beams, communications, and tricorders, Riker and Worf have to leave their friend behind, but no one really considers a surly Romulan on the verge of death a fair trade for their engineer.

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Tags: angry klingons, blindness, diplomacy, dr. crusher is pushy, hell planet, klingons, magic VISOR, neutrinos, orphans, penis-waving around the Neutral Zone, riker drinks alone, rocks, romulans, troi is useless, Wesley is a smartypants

Star Trek: The Next Generation Re-Watch: “Pen Pals”

Eugene Myers

– September 27, 2012 8:00 amPosted in: TNG Re-Watch

“Pen Pals”
Written by Melinda M. Snodgrass, story by Hannah Louise Shearer
Directed by Winrich Kolbe

Season 2, Episode 15
Original air date: May 1, 1989
Star date: 42695.3

Mission summary

Enterprise enters the Selcundi Drema sector to investigate unusual geological instabilities that are destroying its planets, and Commander Riker decides this would make a great test of young Wesley Crusher’s ability to command a survey team to study the problem. Wesley is eager as always, but apprehensive about his performance and whether he’s qualified to give orders to officers who are older and more experienced than him. Meanwhile, Data is experimenting with enhancing the ship’s sensors and picks up a troubling transmission: “Is anybody out there?”

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Tags: big heads, curiosity about humans, Data is annoying, loneliness, rocks, science!, the prime directive: more like guidelines than actual rules, Wesley is a smartypants

Star Trek Animated Series Re-Watch: “Mudd’s Passion”

Eugene Myers & Torie Atkinson

– June 23, 2011 8:00 amPosted in: Animated Series Re-Watch

“Mudd’s Passion”
Written by Stephen Kandel
Directed by Hal Sutherland

Season 1, Episode 10
Production episode: 22008
Original air date: November 10, 1973
Star date: 4978.5

Mission summary

Enterprise makes a special trip to Motherlode in the Arcadian star system in search of one Harcourt Fenton Mudd, wanted on several counts of being annoying. They find the infamous swindler hawking a love potion to the human and ursine miners on the planet, claiming that all it takes is a drop of a magic liquid to compell any woman to love them with a single touch. “It matters not whether you are young, old, fat, ugly or repugnant,” he assures the crowd–and what better way to prove three out of four than by a personal demonstration? He brings up a young blonde who implores, “Please, darling, come back to the ship with me.” Yecch!

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Tags: breeding, emotional Spock, loneliness, lovable rogues, love, rocks, sexism, sexual harassment, why did this have to happen to our beloved legacy

Star Trek Re-Watch: “The Cloud Minders”

Eugene Myers & Torie Atkinson

– February 24, 2011 8:00 amPosted in: TOS Re-Watch

“The Cloud Minders”
Written by Margaret Armen
Story by David Gerrold and Oliver Crawford
Directed by Jud Taylor

Season 3, Episode 21
Production episode: 3×19
Original air date: February 28, 1969
Star date: 5818.4

Mission summary

To combat a devastating botanical plague that threatens the non-botanical life on Merak II, Enterprise heads to Ardana, a Federation world that possesses unobtainium zenite, the only thing in the universe that can save the trees. Upon arrival, they’re invited to the cloud city Stratos for an audience with the High Advisor Plasus, but they’re in too much of a hurry for pomp and circumstance. Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock beam down directly to the zenite mine entrance to pick up the prescription they ordered from drugstore.com and get on their way. However, they do spare some time to gaze admiringly at the city floating above and discuss its utter devotion to art and purely intellectual pursuits.

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Tags: antigravity, botany, class issues, cloud city, fully clothed man-wrestling, funny masks, magical minerals, maguffin, metropolis, mining, plague, rocks, sexy ladies, shower cap security, Spock-blocking, Troglytes, Vulcan sex

Star Trek Re-Watch: “That Which Survives”

Eugene Myers & Torie Atkinson

– January 27, 2011 8:00 amPosted in: TOS Re-Watch

“That Which Survives”
Written by John Meredyth Lucas
Story by Michael Richards
Directed by Herb Wallerstein

Season 3, Episode 17
Production episode: 3×14
Original air date: January 24, 1969
Star date: Unknown

Mission summary

Enterprise is in orbit around what appears to be a “ghost planet,” a planetary body lousy with vegetation despite the fact that it’s only a few thousand years old. Its mass and atmosphere resemble Earth’s (of course), though it’s only the size of Earth’s moon. The crew can’t turn down an opportunity to dig deeper into this mystery and explore “a planet that even Spock can’t explain,” so Captain Kirk, Dr. McCoy, Sulu, and Senior Geologist D’Amato prepare to beam down.

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Tags: abandoned civilizations, computers, emotion, godlike powers, handwaving mumblemumble, hollow planet, loneliness, loyalty, matter-antimatter, purple, reverse polarity, rocks, sexy ladies, stranded, transporter malfunction, viruses

Star Trek Re-Watch: “The Paradise Syndrome”

Eugene Myers & Torie Atkinson

– October 21, 2010 8:00 amPosted in: TOS Re-Watch

“The Paradise Syndrome”
Written by Margaret Armen
Directed by Jud Taylor

Season 3, Episode 3
Production episode: 3×03
Original air date: October 4, 1968
Star date: 4842.6

Mission summary

Captain Kirk, Mr. Spock, and Dr. McCoy beam down into a nature documentary. The captain and doctor immediately fall in love with the rustic setting; despite astronomical odds, the planet is identical to Earth right down to the pine trees, honeysuckle, and metal obelisk in a clearing. No wait, that’s new. Its composition and the markings on the strange building are alien, but there’s no time to study it because a moon-sized asteroid is heading for the planet. They’re on a tight schedule if Enterprise is to have any chance of diverting it.

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Tags: amnesia, fridge stuffing, fully clothed man-wrestling, handwaving mumblemumble, mind meld, paradise, pregnancy, preservers, primitivism, rocks, shirtless Kirk, something racially awesome is about to happen, space samaritans

Star Trek Re-Watch: “Arena”

Eugene Myers & Torie Atkinson

– June 4, 2009 6:24 pmPosted in: TOS Re-Watch

“Arena”
Written by Gene L. Coon (from a story by Fredric Brown)
Directed by Joseph Pevney

Season 1, Episode 18
Production episode: 1×19
Original air date: January 19, 1967
Star date: 3045.6

Mission summary

Captain Kirk and some of his crew prepare for a fancy dinner on Cestus III, an Earth observation outpost in a largely unexplored area of space. Their host, Commodore Travers, is well known for his hospitality and they’re all looking forward to a good meal and entertainment. Instead, when they beam down they discover that Cestus III has been destroyed—and its literally cold-blooded alien attackers are still there. Since the massacre must have occurred several days before, it seems the invitation from Travers was faked to lure the Enterprise to the planet.

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Tags: Angels, does he get a special boy scout badge for that bamboo cannon?, gunpowder, lizard men, rocks, space douches, the outer limits

Star Trek Re-Watch: “The Galileo Seven”

Eugene Myers & Torie Atkinson

– May 28, 2009 5:22 pmPosted in: TOS Re-Watch

“The Galileo Seven”
Written by Oliver Crawford and S. Bar-David
(story by Oliver Crawford)
Directed by Robert Gist

Season 1, Episode 16
Production episode: 1×13
Original air date: January 5, 1967
Star date: 2821.5

Mission summary

The Enterprise is enroute to the New Paris colony on Makus III to deliver medical supplies to victims of an ongoing plague, when Captain Kirk gets distracted by a shiny quasar, Murasaki 321. Galactic High Commissioner Ferris, a grumpy officer in fancy duds, objects to stopping to investigate, but Kirk insists his mission includes scientific study of cosmic phenomenon. They dispatch shuttlecraft 7, the Galileo, to take a closer look with seven crew members on board: Mr. Spock, Dr. McCoy, Mr. Scott, Lieutenant Boma, Mr. Gaetano, Mr. Latimer, and Yeoman Mears. It shouldn’t take long to get some readings and return to the ship and resume their journey to Makus III.

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Tags: emotion, Galileo, giant props, logic, monkeymen, rocks, Scotty works a miracle, shuttle