“The Outrageous Okona”
Teleplay by Burton Armus
Story by Les Menchen, Lance Dickson, David Landsberg
Directed by Robert Becker
Season 2, Episode 4
Original air date: December 12, 1988
Star date: 42402.7
Mission summary
As the Enterprise makes its way through a twin planetary system, it stumbles across a class 9 freighter called the Erstwhile. Onboard, a single plucky human is trying to whack the side of his guidance system to get it working again. He makes a few flat jokes and Picard, ever the humanitarian, decides to help out this disheveled, saucy “rogue”–let’s call him Sman Smolo–and asks Geordi to work on replacing the guidance system for him.
Smolo, who goes by “Okona,” beams aboard and immediately tries some lines on the lady at the transporter post:
OKONA: And thank you for beaming me here and enabling me to see a truly beautiful woman. You have the majestic carriage and loveliness that could surely be traced back to the noblest of families.
ROBINSON: Well, I’m sure that you’ve said that to many ladies before, and it was no more true then than it is now.
OKONA: But it’s how I say it that’s really important. The warmth, the attraction that I have for you. The attraction that we share.
Riker and Geordi look at one another meaningfully because it’s always funny to watch your coworkers get harassed by arrogant douches, especially when they use words like “carriage” that are probably best left to auto repair guides and not used on women. (Suspension of disbelief destroyed in 3…) Robinson is successfully seduced (…2…) and gives Okona her room number (…1! HAHA YEAH RIGHT). That lovable scamp is going to turn this place upside down, just you wait!
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